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TODAY'S NEWS, March 8, 2024

The News of Today is the History of Tomorrow





IN POLITICAL NEWS


1) When President Trump said you'll win so much you'll get tired of winning---maybe he was talking about himself. He capped a spectacular week with the RNC killing any resolution to prevent the party from paying his legal fees.


2) In what Tucker Carlson described as the "darkest, most un-American speech ever given by an American president," Rutabaga scored a massive success for himself last night and a monstrous defeat for the DemoKKKrats (including him) in November. Besides specifically going after President Trump by name---something no one has ever done, Rutabaga lied, ranted, celebrated transoidism, blamed Trump and Republicans for everything, and once again revealed his "Dark Brandon" self. What was the success you ask? Rutabaga stayed upright and didn't zone out for over an hour. The White House doctors are to be congratulated---their combination of aderall, speed (and he was speeding), and steroids kept him upright. And where they failed the demon infesting him supplied Satanic supernatural power. But Rutabaga's success was his, and the DemoKKKrats', ultimate downfall. He absolutely will not be replaced now. Had he engaged in a complete meltdown, fallen, looked lost, even some of the holdout DemoKKKrat loyalists would have begun Article 25 proceedings. Now we are guaranteed of this evil dolt being the candidate.


3) Whether it's Rutabaga in the Mumble of the Union or Benghazi-by-the-Lake, the new "in" thing is to radically raise taxes on the rich. Hey, doesn't affect me except I cannot find one time in American history where raising taxes on the rich either fixed a budget, spurred economic growth, or lowered inflation. Inevitable. If you let cities and states get away with it in one arena, they will in all.


4) A Kentucky resolution will use the "sanctuary city" rationale to disregard federal fossil fuel regs. Except Grand Moff Garland will prosecute Kentucky, and it will be again left to a court to decide when and where to apply fairness and equality.


5) Those great humanitarians at Planned Parenthood are contracting the sale of baby body parts for intellectual property.


6) Sick, sick, sick: A depraved mother and son are charged with sexually abusing children as young as five and livestreaming it for cash.


7) Colorado is just the latest "used to be good" state that has descended into hell, as an investigator is probing a forensic examiner who performed shoddy work. If this is proven, hundreds of people will be freed from jails.


8) Senator Bob Menendez, the corrupt Jersey U.S. Senator, won't run for reelection but won't stand down either.


9) More winning as the North Carolina schools chief lost the primary to a homeschool parent tired of radical agendas.


10) Also in NC, a college junior beat a 10-term lawmaker in the GOP primary for a statehouse seat..


11) New York's thoroughly evil AG, Letitia James, gave a speech to the Fire Department of New York, where she was booed and interrupted by chants of "Trump!" "Trump!" "Trump!"


12) Judge Cannon has accepted Team Trump's amicus briefs challenging Count Dooku (Jack Smith) as illegitimate and illegally appointed.


13) The "Gilbert Goons," a violent gang of Gilbert, AZ, teens beat a single teen, Preston Lord, to death outside a Halloween party. Seven have now been arrested.


IN ILLEGAL CRIMINAL ALIEN NEWS


14) What's new? AP lies. In the Fuhrer's State of the Fatherland to the loyal Nazis last night, Rutabaga was challenged by Marjorie Taylor Greene to "say her name" referring to Lakin Riley. He did, or so AP claims. Except he called her "Lincoln." Evil analhole.


15) An expert on communism explains how the illegal criminal invasion is being used to destroy America.


IN TRANSOID NEWS


16) In Portland a woman was convicted of "harassment" and "hate speech" for referring to a man transoid trying to use a female bathroom as a man. This must end. Normal people, you are now the Jews in Nazi Germany in 1934. Better get out of the Hitleresque holocaust regions now.


IN ECONOMIC NEWS


17) From David Blackmon, the Rush Limbaugh of energy, now PIRG, a nanny/Karen climate hoax front, is going after Home Depot employees for not warning about the dangers of gas stoves.


18) Oh? The Washington Compost says that with "explosive growth" we are running out of grid. Who knew? Well, besides me, David Blackmon, and a thousand other people warning about this ridiculous "green" program that cannot generation power to survive, let alone grow.


19) Another horrible jobs report: 275,000 added but all went to foreign workers.


20) Full time jobs fell while part time jobs soared. In a state where citizens cannot afford homes, Kollyfornia has moved to expand its zero-down-payment interest-free home mortgage program for illegal criminal invaders.


21) Bitcoin reached another all-time high of $69,420.


IN INTERNATIONAL NEWS


22) Sometimes it's just not your day. In Gaza, five were killed by falling U.S. aid packages that were airdropped.


23) I'm sorry, but this is the news today. Truly a sad and terrible day, but the Malaysian government knows that happened to flight MH370 and covered it up. The captain, Zaharie Ahmad Shah committed mass suicide, according to an aviation expert who learned Zaharie had a flight simulator at home where, despite supposedly deleting his practice runs, authorities learned he had practiced the crash. Aviation expert Geoffrey thomas, using radio waves, tracked the plane to its crash site, where debris was found. Zaharie had an odd obsession with two Malaysian models, sending them creepy messages on Fascistbook. The Malaysian government has covered up details because it does not want responsibility.

24) Mass looting in Haiti has sparked food shortages. as gang leader (not making this up) Jimmy "Barbeque" Cherizier has taken over the government.


IN ENTERTAINMENT NEWS


25) Kids just being kids. Five Beverly Hills middle school students were expelled for using AI to develop pornographic images of their classmates.


AND FINALLY . . .


26) This is where we're headed. An AI robot felt up a woman's butt at a Saudi AI event. So how long before robots are charged with sexual harassment?



Larry Schweikart

Rock drummer, Film maker,NYTimes #1 bestselling author

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